Chapter 84: What Decent Person Would Do Such a Thing?

"Hello, I'm in a bit of trouble right now and need two dollars for an emergency. Could you help me out?"
Zhang Chen and Qi Jiajia had already reached the busiest intersection on the commercial street. The two split up, approaching people who looked friendly to ask for money.
"I'm in trouble too. Who's going to give me two dollars?"
"No, I have no money."
"These days, even beggars dress so well."
...
The responses from passersby were all over the place, but not one person offered a helping hand.
Both Zhang Chen and Qi Jiajia were getting a headache. After trying separately for a while with no results, they regrouped to discuss their strategy.
"What do we do?" Zhang Chen leaned helplessly against a lamppost, exhausted.
"I don't know," Qi Jiajia replied, just as frustrated. "Logically, it shouldn't be this hard. Maybe we don't look pitiful enough, so they think we're just trying to scam them?"
"But aren't we actually scamming them?" Zhang Chen chuckled.
"Maybe we should try to look a bit more miserable?" Qi Jiajia suggested.
"How? Rip our clothes, smear our faces black, and look like real beggars?"
"If you want to, I won't stop you..." Qi Jiajia imagined the scene and couldn't help but laugh.
"For just two dollars... am I supposed to ruin my reputation?" Zhang Chen couldn't hold back a curse.
Qi Jiajia pressed her lips together, about to say something but hesitated.
Zhang Chen noticed her expression and frowned. "What's with that look? I didn't do anything. Don't tell me you think I'm being insensitive again? If so, that's on you."
Qi Jiajia was caught between laughter and tears. She reminded him, "Did you forget we're live streaming?"
"I didn't forget."
"Then why did you just..."
"Just what?"
"You cursed."
Zhang Chen tilted his head to the sky, even more annoyed. "It was the heat of the moment, no big deal, right?"
Qi Jiajia changed the subject. "Let's try again. This time, let's make our story sound more tragic."
Zhang Chen nodded, agreeing to the plan.
Just then, a tall, imposing Black man, dressed from head to toe in high-end clothes, walked by. Without thinking, Zhang Chen quickly grabbed his arm. "Hey, brother."
The man thought Zhang Chen wanted to start a fight, so he raised his chin and looked down his nose at him. "Whatsup?"
Zhang Chen immediately felt the pressure and put on an utterly pitiful face. Suddenly inspired, he said,
"I was tricked into coming here by a pyramid scheme. I just escaped, and now I don't have a cent on me—no money for a bus, no money for food. I haven't eaten in almost two days. I can't take it anymore, please, could you spare two dollars so I can buy something to eat? Good things happen to good people."
His face looked like he was about to cry, as if he really hadn't eaten in two days—utterly pathetic.
Qi Jiajia, standing beside him: ...Dude, aren't you laying it on a bit thick?
"Please, brother, just two dollars so I can fill my stomach!" Zhang Chen was now fully immersed in his own script.
But at that moment, the Black man Zhang Chen had grabbed looked down, his gaze landing on Zhang Chen's wrist.
Sunlight glinted off the glass of the watch he wore—brilliant gold, dazzling.
"Patek Philippe?" the man raised an eyebrow.
Zhang Chen: ...
Qi Jiajia: ...
The viewers in the live stream were nearly doubled over with laughter.
[Help, he's hilarious]
[Literal "Black guy with a question mark" face]
[Black guy: You think I don't know luxury brands?]
[Damn, I'm dying laughing]
...
Never in his life had Zhang Chen felt so embarrassed.
Where was a hole in the ground when you needed one? He desperately wanted to crawl into one.
The Black man smirked meaningfully and asked, "Funny?"
Zhang Chen: ...
In the end, the man shook off Zhang Chen's hand and walked away with a few choice words.
Qi Jiajia was left clutching her stomach from laughing so hard.
"So that's why we can't get any money—the watch is to blame," Zhang Chen said, awkwardly turning the watch on his wrist. Suddenly, a thought struck him. He smacked his forehead. "Wait a minute—doesn't this mean I actually have money? How did I forget about this?"
Qi Jiajia was still laughing. "What?"
"I could just sell it, and I'd have money!" Zhang Chen grinned smugly.
"You're going to sell your watch for two dollars?" Qi Jiajia's mouth twitched.
"No big deal—it's just a watch." Zhang Chen couldn't help but think, "Trust me to be so clever!"
The live stream comments:
[Just a watch, he says...]
[Someone check his taxes]
[How are the rest of us supposed to live?]
...
The cameraman interjected, "No, that's against the rules."
Zhang Chen: ...
If this doesn't work and that doesn't work, Zhang Chen's face darkened.
"Can someone please help us?" he wailed.
Just then, a little girl ran over, tugged at his pant leg, and handed him two dollars.
Zhang Chen was so moved his eyes filled with tears. He squatted down and hugged her. "Are you my little angel sent from heaven?"
"I'm not having ice cream today, so you can use this to buy something to eat," the girl said, running back to her mother standing nearby.
A beautiful white woman stood at the curb, smiling and waving at Zhang Chen.
He thanked them profusely.
Finally, they had begged for the money. In twenty-six years, Zhang Chen had never found it so hard to get money. He was so touched, his hands trembled as he held the two dollars.
"We have money now!"
Live stream comments:
[So you finally know how it feels]
[Come on, Brother Chen, repeat after me: Every grain is hard-earned]
[He finally gets to be poor for once, and it's got him all worked up]
...
"Let's go! To the telescope! I'm rich now!"
Zhang Chen grabbed Qi Jiajia, and the two of them ran excitedly toward the museum.
Meanwhile, Lu Zhou and Ye Fangfei, also in the heart of the commercial street, were struggling to ask strangers for two dollars.
Compared to Zhang Chen and Qi Jiajia, their approach was much more reserved.
They didn't have many tricks up their sleeves, nor did they try to act pitiful; instead, they simply explained their situation to friendly-looking passersby, saying they were filming a show and asking for help.
Some people walked away before they finished explaining. Some shook their heads as soon as they heard it was about money. Some, upon hearing it was for a show, asked, "If I give you money, will the production team give it back later?"
...
Of course, there were still some kind-hearted souls who eventually helped them.
They took the money to the top floor of the museum, used the telescope to spot a distant church, and tried to count how many tourists were taking pictures at the door. However, it was simply too far, and the tourists kept moving around.
After looking through the telescope three times, their answers were all wrong.
Failed, asked for more money, failed again, tried again—eventually, many people on the street caught on to their routine and started suspecting they were con artists, so it became much harder to get money.
When the two of them returned to the plaza on the commercial street, facing the endless stream of passersby, they hesitated, feeling embarrassed to ask anyone for money.
Standing by the roadside, Lu Zhou and Ye Fangfei exchanged a wry smile.
"So what do we do? Should we try the task on Rose Street instead?" Ye Fangfei asked.
Lu Zhou put his hands on his hips and looked around. In the distance, he spotted a crowd gathered in the plaza, and thought he could faintly hear applause.
After a moment, he smiled. "Should we try performing for money?"
Ye Fangfei was taken aback, then laughed. "So it's come to this?"
"Do you have a better idea?"
"No," Ye Fangfei shrugged helplessly, then turned to the staff. "Performing for money isn't against the rules, is it?"
Staff: "It's not."
Ye Fangfei looked up at Lu Zhou. "Let's do it."
Lu Zhou pointed to the distant plaza. "Let's go over there."
As they turned to leave, Lu Zhou's hand was suddenly grabbed.
He turned in surprise to see that the Spider-Man who had been standing nearby had come to life and was now holding his hand.
Ye Fangfei burst out laughing. "I always thought that was a statue... Turns out it's a real person in costume!"
"Why are you grabbing me?" Lu Zhou asked the man in the Spider-Man suit, bewildered.
"Tip," Spider-Man said.
"Huh?"
Lu Zhou looked at Ye Fangfei, who was just as confused. "What?"
"You took a picture with me, so you owe a five-dollar tip," Spider-Man said with a smile.
Lu Zhou was dumbfounded. "But I didn't take a picture with you."
Spider-Man pointed to the nearby cameraman, implying that photos had definitely been taken.
So that's how it worked? They were struggling to get two dollars, and this guy just straight up asked for a five-dollar tip?
Live stream comments:
[Is this considered extortion?]
[People abroad really know how to hustle]
[Forget studying, I'm going to dress as Spider-Man and stand on the street abroad]
...
Lu Zhou couldn't help but laugh. "I have no money. How about you lend me your costume, I'll put it on, and we can take a new picture together—then we'll call it even?"
Spider-Man looked at him with an indescribable expression, then waved them away.
Ye Fangfei laughed out loud. "Is that a solution any normal person would think of?"
Live stream comments:
[Classic Lu Zhou]
[That's our Lu Zhou]
[I've learned something new]
...