Chapter Fifty-Nine: The Remote-Controlled Lover

The next day, I had to return to school. I had skipped classes all day yesterday, and if I didn’t go back now, there’d be nothing but trouble waiting for me. Yet, thankfully, my mood as I headed back was completely different from the last time.

I meant to go alone, but Lele insisted on accompanying me to the station.

“Lele, let’s go back together. I could use a full-time laundry maid at school,” I revealed my true colors barely a day after making up with Lele.

“Hmph, as if I’d bother! I have classes too!” Lele pinched me hard. “Pig, remember to think of me often.”

“Hehe, I won’t think of you at all. I’ll look for someone else at school and drive you mad with jealousy.” I teased her.

Lele snorted and turned her face away.

“Uh, Lele, I’m sorry! Don’t be mad, I was just joking. I wouldn’t dare…” I hadn’t expected Lele to get upset so easily, so I hurried to apologize.

She turned her gaze back and smiled at my flustered expression. So it was all an act! Still, I smacked my own head in annoyance and confessed, “I really am an idiot—never know what to say.”

“Pig, you don’t have to try so hard to please me. That’s exhausting,” Lele said, hands clasped behind her back, swaying from side to side.

“It’s not exhausting at all. I… I’m more than willing…” I protested, and suddenly felt my cheeks flush uncontrollably.

Standing there, dazed before Lele, I watched her tightly pressed lips, her expression so adorable. Seeing my distraction, Lele asked curiously, “Xiaobei, what are you thinking about?”

“N-nothing. Definitely nothing improper…” I blurted out.

She looked even more puzzled. “What improper thing?”

“No, no, not at all…” The more I explained, the messier it got, so I hastily changed the subject.

The long-distance bus was about to depart, and the waiting hall’s broadcast repeated its urging for passengers to board, the sharp voice filling me with an inexplicable melancholy.

“Pighead, remember to call me often. If I have time, I’ll come see you…” Lele’s eyes brimmed with tears as she looked at me, and her sorrow made me feel sad, too.

“Lele, don’t be like this. It’s just school, and in a few months, the holidays will be here—it’ll fly by!” I gently hugged her slender waist from behind, breathing in that fresh green apple scent unique to Lele.

She turned in my arms, pressing against my chest, and said earnestly, “Beizi Pig, take good care of yourself. Only you can make me happy.”

I wanted to say more, but my throat felt blocked and not a word would come out. We simply leaned against each other in silence, as if time itself had frozen.

Back at school, I happened to arrive just in time for roll call in the afternoon English class—such luck was unstoppable.

Huang Xin had already switched seats to the front row, saving us from any awkward encounters. Bored silly in the classroom, I couldn’t resist texting Lele.

“Li Xiaobei, why are you grinning like an idiot over there?” Yangyang, in the front row, turned around and saw me smiling to myself at my phone. She gave me a curious look and pretended to snatch my phone.

I knew Yangyang was joking and immediately kicked at her, “Mind your own business and read your novel.”

“Hmph, you look so lecherous, how can I focus!” Yangyang leaned her whole body onto my desk, glanced at the English teacher on the podium, and whispered, “Come on, did you just hook up with someone new?”

“Guess all you want—I’m not telling you.” Not knowing how to respond, I ducked my head and kept texting.

Nothing but boredom awaited me in the dorm, so after class I went with Zhao Gang to the internet café for some NBA games. On the way to Student Street, I unexpectedly ran into Xiaolei.

“Piggy Bei, good morning!” Xiaolei greeted me from afar, then said a few words to her friends before skipping over. Seeing her, Zhao Gang tactfully picked up his pace, leaving us a bit of space.

“Morning? It’s nearly five o’clock, big sis,” I yawned and replied indifferently.

“Big? You wish! So, where are you guys headed?” Xiaolei asked with a mischievous grin.

I curled my lip and said, “Where else? The internet café.”

“I thought you’d spend a few more days with Lele, but you came back so soon.” A mysterious look crossed Xiaolei’s face. “Ah, men! Men!”

“Huh? How did you know?” I couldn’t help but marvel at how girls these days seemed to have a sixth sense for gossip.

“Are you a pig? You get to have friends there—why can’t I? The intel I got yesterday said our adorable Lord Bei was whispering sweet nothings to the lovely Lele on campus, scandalizing everyone.” Xiaolei spun circles beside me, hands behind her back, with a teasing expression. “Well, now that you’ve rekindled the old flame, shouldn’t you treat us to something?”

“Whatever, I don’t care,” I replied, feigning indifference.

After finally shaking off Xiaolei and arriving at the internet café, my mood soared. The game felt smoother than ever, and in my match with Zhao Gang, I actually started to win. Out of four games, I won two, and one loss was by a mere point after double overtime, prompting Zhao Gang to marvel at my rapid progress.

The greatest benefit of breaking up with Huang Xin was not having to go to evening self-study anymore. After dinner, I rushed back to the dorm, eager to report to Lele on our “family hotline.”

On the phone, Lele said she wanted me to be her “remote lover.”

Remote lover—that was a new one. “Lele, what does that mean?” I asked, baffled.

“Well, remote lover… Pighead, you’ve watched TV, right?” Lele said, trying to sound profound.

“Of course I have, everyone’s watched TV. What’s that got to do with it?” I replied, clueless.

“Then you know about remote controls.” Lele continued to lead me.

“Yes, I do. So?” From her tone, I sensed something was up.

“Hehe, from now on, you’re the TV and I’m the remote control,” Lele declared triumphantly. “Got it now?”

Her explanation left me speechless. So that’s what she meant by “remote lover!” It seemed my tragic fate was about to begin anew.

I couldn’t help but sigh.

(Chapter revised on September 9, 2010)